I’ll be watching you: stalking

Someone who stalks a BF or GF (or an ex) is usually possessive and controlling. Stalking includes following someone around or leaving messages on their phone or online, and deliberately trying to make them feel scared.

A guy watching someone through a window

A stalker is often possessive of their girlfriend/boyfriend or ex, and thinks,

You’re mine – you do as I say and don’t you dare leave me!

They don’t care about their boyfriend’s or girlfriend’s right to freedom, privacy and independence.

They often want to have power over their BF/GF or ex or want to punish them for breaking up.

They might like the power of making their partner feel like they’re being watched.

Am I being stalked?

You might only realise you’re being stalked if weird things keep happening, like:

  • lots of phone calls, emails or texts from the same number or address
  • lots of messages on your Facebook from the same person
  • notes or other things left on your car or at your house
  • realising that you’re being followed
  • being continually stared at by another person.

Stalking can also involve threats or sexual comments. The stalker often tries make the person they’re stalking feel intimidated and scared.

Stalking a girlfriend, boyfriend or ex, or someone else, is against the law in Victoria. Stalking someone online is also against the law.

If someone is stalking you: you can report it

How are you feeling?

If you’re being stalked, it can make you feel nervous or overwhelmed, like you’re losing control over your life. You might feel forced into changing your life, where you go and what you do.

Its’ a good idea to talk to a friend, adult and/or a counsellor. You don’t have to go through this alone.

There are services that can help you.

Related links

Photo from Flickr by btindrelunas / CC BY-NC 2.0

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